Desperate Princess in Dubai
It's funny what desperation does to a human being. Trying to keep your head above water, trying to forget troubles while in the outside world. Because when people know your troubles, they will try and take advantage. Evil people do that.
They say 'what comes around goes around'. I have done nothing 'bad' to anyone for this stuff to happen to me: all the stuff that I have had to endure in the last year. My blog is a reflection of what has happened to me. It started off all dreamy, head stuck in the clouds. Why did I even bother? My dreams are positively shattered. I now face reality. I started off as a Desperate Princess in fantasy land, and now I see the day in which I really am a Desperate Princess. Funny, isn't it, how things work out.
My soul is yearning for comfort. I wake up thinking 'what's next', then I start crying, feeling totally helpless. Sometimes I remember the angels in my life and that people can only do so much - mostly with kind words and good intentions. It's impossible to really help somebody here. You can't beat the way things work. What has happened to me will definitely come back to haunt these wrongdoers in some way or another.
19 comments:
"My soul is yearning for comfort. I wake up thinking 'what's next', then I start crying, feeling totally helpless. Sometimes I remember the angels in my life and that people can only do so much - mostly with kind words and good intentions."
Girl, that's soul-talk from the core! If I may be honest, several friends and I are in similar pond of emotions. Sometimes, I don't even know why?! It's amazing, in a city like NYC, where you've got so many people & characters and then some, one shall find the loneliest souls, and it almost feels like everybody *prefers* it that way?! There's also a chunk of folks who love playing games, even those committed - and of course, the city is often referred to as a "swing town"!
What comes around, goes around - and sometimes we think to ourselves, if nothing went around, what's all this coming around?! Life works itself out in strange ways - the more I discover and find myself, the more I seem to believe, companionship and comfort perhaps lies in melancholic solitude.
A prayer to ride out a mild storm on your way to lasting companionship and comfort. Hope you are back to your happy, witty and sweet cheeky self.
Peace!
Thanks a million, rosh. I do luv my blogging chums and their kind words, especially you ;-)
Yeah I woke up and burst into tears, then called an ex of mine who is a really nice person, and started crying lol! He taught me many good things, like how to be thankful for the things you have. I keep thinking of this lesson when the going gets extremely tough.
Re: this post, my soul yearns for comfort not necessarily from individuals - I just seek repair to it from the damage that has been done over the last year. Hopelessness is a terrible situation to be in, and being at the mercy of others is even worse.
Anyway I've been talking to many people in similar situations, and it gives me comfort to know there are good people in the world.
Life seems to difficult at times but I've learned there's ups AND downs. It's not easy being female either, and having to deal with downs in Dubai - as I am sure you can understand - lol!
Thank you so much for your wishes.
Sweet and cheeky? Hell yeah LOL! :)
Am a cheeky monkey:P
Thanks rosh...:)
This year is nearly over, thankfully. I had a few bad patches, especially with the death of my motherbylaw, who had lived with me for almost 18yrs. The only comfort I allowed myself was that she was happy living here in Abu Dhabi. I turned the dreaded half-century early in the year & my partner in life for the last 32yrs, plus 2 amazing friends (met through blogging) kept my head from sinking into the depths of complete sanity. The deportation episode tested me to the absolute limit, coupled with a despicably evil driver who literally aimed his car at us (on the bike) at 120kmph. My 'faith' in the UAE as a whole has taken a real dive, but I keep telling myself that next year will be better :-)
I'm a firm believer in the 'what goes around, comes around' theory. (In the case of the above mentioned fuckwit driver, I have his registration & if I see his car parked up anywhere, I'll maybe offer him a new paint job via a squirt of brake fluid)
You hang in there hon......as Rosh says, life works itself out in strange ways. Better still is the famous qote (dunno by whom tho) of Life Is a Journey, So Enjoy The Ride :-)
*hugs*
i feel the same.
I believe that there is a balance between good and evil. As many greedy and selfish people there is you'll find the gentle and good hearted.
Unfortunately the genuinely good hearted get hurt and used too many times that they close off their good souls to the world.
"What goes around, comes around" is something that I firmly believe in. However I sometimes feel that if I take justice into my own hands it would make me feel better... and trust me it doesn't because it's a never ending cycle.
So to those that have hurt me in the past: I might not be there when justice is finally served but I know that it will hurt them ten folds!
So hang in there girl. 2009 is right around the corner and I'm looking forward to what it has in stock for us.
Like you are wishing the same will happen to your perpetrators, is it not possible that this is what is happening to you right now for all the times you have hurt others through your words,actions,insults and ignorance of the difficulties they face in life? Romantic worries you are facing now probably do not even list as worries in other people's lives often. There are bigger things in life these people face. But then I don't think you will get what I am saying.
dear desperate princess, hope you're feeling better. life isn't easy as it is, but it just seems so much more difficult in dubai. if you have a good set of friends, then it's so much easier. remember, your attitude is what makes your life better or worse than it really is so think positive thoughts and have a great festive season !
hope you're feeling better. life isn't easy as it is, and it just seems so much more difficult in dubai. remember, attitude is what makes your life better or worse than what it actually is so think positive thoughts & have a great festive season !
*jayne,
I have felt this way for a long time but it all just came out. After reading your post, I thought I should let it all out too! Boy, it has been a real relief.
I've been reading your blog since day one, and you tell it like it is. It was nice to put a face to the name via the GN feature too.
'Chin up' is the way to go, I guess! I don't like that phrase 'just surviving' and when one has to succumb to that, it sux! I wanna live and KICK :P LOL! In your case, ride! haha :P
*Max - thanks for your visit. I couldn't have said it any better. There is humility and dignity in your words. What goes around comes around, indeed. I posted this completely helpless, but now I see the light after reflection and also lovely comments from dear blogger pals and new visits such as yours.
*Anon, what you're saying is that you might not have agreed with views on mine in the past.
*dubai madame - thank you so much! I am feeling MUCH better after this rare 'vent' post, and given the kind words here from fellow bloggers, including yours. Yes, I agree life in Dubai is difficult. Just have to move on from the past and look forward to the future. :)
I got the nicest, hugest Xmas hamper today..! Definitely lifted my spirits. 2009 is the way forward :) Thanks for your kind words and sentiments.
Wishing you all a great festive season :)
I look like a bag of snakes/rocks & have got enough issues to send a shrink running for cover (*she says, talking from experience.........go for a consultation & next time the buggers have either emigrated or moved to another city!)Blogging can be such good therapy & a whole heap cheaper than a shrink, so don't ever be afraid to 'offload' - whether its a sad/depressing/happy post or not, cos you'll feel better for doing it :-) I've pretty much always said my bit (foot in mouth syndrome) & sod the consequences, but whilst living here, I have to reign myself in, cos otherwise I'd be deported faster than any quick shag on the beach!
Hope you have a good crimble & I wish you all the very best for the new year hon *hugs*
LOL @ shag on the beach ;-)
Jayne thanks a lot for the encouragement. I do feel a whole load better after writing this post and am, in fact, very excited about what 2009 will bring.
Have a very Happy Christmas and enjoy the day tomorrow!
x
Merry Christmas Princess!
rosh - how was your Christmas? Maybe you will have a post about it.
For me, it was the best ever - it was the best EVER. I spent the evening laughing with friends and family, and boy, it was a big fat turkey that accompanied the joy! Not to mention the nice veggies and gravy as company - the ice cream was a heavenly dessert.
We shared some amazing stories amongst a backdrop of Dubai garden in the otherwise cold desert! A perfect Christmas - like one I would like to experience time and again.
Merry Christmas, rosh:)
happy holidays!
Thank you, dear mars! I hope you are having a very happy holiday cookie ;-)
Seems like yours was better than mine :) I had a lovely but quiet Christmas at home with mom & dad and rest of the family. These are the simple things I wait all year. Mom whipped up her to die for Christmas recipes - I had gallons of her pudding. I look like a Panda now :)
I should blog more often. Trust me I think about it all the time. To be honest, this summer, I've sort of moved up the corporate slave ladder - hence responsible for more than the Americas, which pretty much, has eroded social/personal time. Growing up is hard eh?
Nice to see you all cheery again :)
2008 was the worst year of my life, but it's 2009 now and I have new hopes and new dreams. Happy New Year to you, and I wish it brings better days for you. Cheer up, you're still a Princess.
Thanks a lot, Qatar Cat! Just so you know, I used to read your blog but my internet connection was so bad it took ages to load so I couldn't keep up with blogs I liked but now things have changed for the better.
If 2008 was your worst year so far, here's to hoping 2009 will be the best ever.
Lots of hugs and kisses - and remember one of my first posts on your blog - like your eyes, hun heheh!!
Bet you learned the Arabic phrase for that already :P
Thank you for your comment, fellow Princess in Q ;-) xxx
chica,
Time heals, in the mean time try to keep yourself busy....... do new things......escape..............reality............. life goes on....... it will humble most of us....... and the smart ones we sheild ourselfs and only give in slowly ......so dont worry you will be up in no time
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